How am I supposed to do these things?

I have DSL again!!

A certain wireless and DSL provider that shall remain nameless (but whose name involves three initials and an & sign) completely cut off my DSL service by mistake last week. Today was the first day I could arrange to be home and wait around for a technician to set me up with what constitutes a brand new DSL service, even though they seemed to be able to cut it off just fine without me being there.

How was I supposed to update my blog? Do my IRB amendments? Do practice Step II board questions? Surf the net? Hang out on Facebook? Try to chip away at my burgeoning blog reader?

You’d think I’d get some reading done. I am supposed to be reading two hours a night on medical learning type topics. Well, how am I supposed to get that done when my 11 year old clogs up the toilet…again? When our puny plunger doesn’t work, I had to go to Home Depot and pick out the only toilet auger that doesn’t have a UPC code on it, and then I get stuck at the self checkout line singing “This Old Man” with my six year old, a plunger and a toilet auger, waiting for the cashier to find the code for it.

Then, on the way home, my 11 year old calls and says “You need to stop by grandma’s house on the way home because the second page of my article didn’t print.” Remember the no DSL thing? Well, when I picked them up from their grandma’s house after school yesterday, the 11 year old was told to print out an article there for his biweekly science current events homework. Somehow in between eating chocolate and watching TV while he was doing it he managed to not get the second page. I drove by grandma’s house, after telling him on the phone I was beyond annoyed at him, his cloggy poop and his half printed article, and that his grandma better have the article ready for me to pick up, since it was already getting to be the six year old’s bedtime. Grandma is about as technologically inclined as, well, many grandmas, and was having problems printing the article. So, I had to go in and figure out the issue, print it, and bring it to the 11 year old who was supposed to be done with his project by then.

Then, I had teach myself to use a toilet auger by watching this video (John from NJ, I know it is a video about unclogging a toilet, but for Maude’s sake put on a clean t-shirt) on my phone (remember, no DSL). Then, I had to apply my knowledge to the poopy toilet. And put the six year old to bed. And edit the current event science assignment. And supervise the eleven year old making the lunches and getting showered. (He fell asleep in the shower! Yes, he did. I know. He did. No, I am not kidding.) And clean up the kitchen and dining room table from making dinner.

Needless to say, I only got about ten minutes of reading done last night. But, as of right now, I have a working toilet, kids with finished homework (I think), and a one casserole dish meal planned for tonight. Let’s see if I can get a blog post done and maybe twenty minutes of reading. Wish me luck.


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3 responses to “How am I supposed to do these things?

  1. Oh Hilary! I live your life! (with the grandma in FL, while I am in Seattle!) Hugs to you for all you do, and for doing it all so well, and with humor!

  2. You didn’t find John’s outfit incredibly sexy? What is wrong with you?

    Did you really use a toilet auger? Those drawings looked so anatomical.

    • MomTFH

      I know, and I thought I had low standards! I guess they are still too high.

      It was almost like a shoulder dystocia. But dirtier and stinkier.

      Oh, I just compared delivering a baby to clearing a clogged toilet. Bad, bad med student.

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