I am up too early, considering. I think my husband and kids went to Panera to get me one of their evil egg souffles, hopefully with enough bagels for everyone else so I don’t end up having to make breakfast anyway.
I am really looking forward to eating brunch here, at my new most favorite restaurant ever. I made a batch of chicken broth last night, and was too eager to try it. I am afraid I burned the roof of my mouth and tongue a little bit. Argh! I have been waiting to eat here again for 2 months! It’s not that bad, but still. Bad timing.
I have been musing about motherhood ever since it was announced on Feministing that Feministing founder Jessica Valenti is pregnant. Jessica had an intensely scrutinized wedding recently. I am not a regular reader, commenter or contributor at Feministing, but I have generally been a Jessica Valenti fan from afar. When I read that she was pregnant, I wanted to write her a letter that said “You think the wedding business was rough. You ain’t seen scrutiny, judgment and lack of autonomy until you get pregnant, and then become a parent.” If she thinks having a fairly traditional wedding was surprisingly difficult as a woman and as a feminist, she will be sorely disappointed in how many people have an opinion about intensely personal aspects of her reproduction, birthing and parenting. And, how many of these opinions completely disregard her ability to make decisions for herself.
Luckily for me, The Unnecesarean has a great guest post up for Mother’s Day. So, I don’t have to write a whole post on this. Allison Phayre asks people to lay off the mom judgment as her wish for Mother’s Day:
But if I have one wish for Mother’s Day, it is that we remember that the mother sacrifices a lot of herself even before that baby is born. It’s not fair to tell a mother that her wishes for her birth experience don’t matter, as OBs often do by dismissing birth plans or refusing to be guided by them…Mom and mom alone understands on a very intimate and basic level how her safety and baby’s safety are intertwined, and the right balance of risks between those two people is going to be different for each mom and baby. Please, let’s take back the birth culture and practices in this country, so every expectant mom is not a vessel to be handled whatever way her care providers prefer, but remains an autonomous PERSON who is in control of her own body, her own pregnancy, her baby, and her birth.
I also cover some of this, including what happens after the actual birth, in my Mommy Wars Bingo Card. Let’s all cut moms (including ourselves!) some slack this Mother’s Day.