How much peanut butter?

Like any good mother, I managed to rifle through Z’s weekend take home folder late Sunday night. Hey, at least it’s not tomorrow morning on the way to school! Well, I forgot to get the apple juices for the party. I will bring them by when I pick him up. The note says by Monday, and last time I checked, it’s Monday all day tomorrow.

I also found a notice sent home by the county health department with guidelines on how to make a lunch for my son. First of all, it sounds like some sort of weird decree:

“Meals provided by parents shall consist of the following:”

Shall? How about should? Or even better, “We suggest lunches consist of the following:”

But, even better, the amounts are ridiculously high or strange.

For example:

One of my options in the “A” category is “Peanut butter – 1/2 cup”. I instantly thought of my friend badbadivy, who wouldn’t serve that much peanut butter to her kids in a whole week. Who would feed a three year old 1/2 cup of peanut butter? Seriously, that is a lot!

Category “C” has only one choice: “Bread – 1 slice”. 1/2 cup of peanut butter on ONE slice of bread? Uh, that sandwich would totally choke my son. And, the “shall” decree doesn’t seem to allow any flexibility. Could I put it on two pieces of bread? A pita? Pasta salad?

Category “D” also has only one option: “Butter – 1 teaspoon”.

Huh? It doesn’t say any of the categories are optional.

I am seriously depriving my kid. I figured I knew a lot about nutrition. I don’t think I have ever included a teaspoon of butter in Z’s lunch. Hmmm. Next time he will get a butter pat with his apple sauce. With the 2 ounces of cheese as an option for category “A”, a pat of butter required in “D” and another serving of dairy in category “E” with “Milk – 1 cup (8 oz)” I am beginning to wonder if this chart was written by a dairy farmer.

I am really tempted to write a note back to the school, but I know they didn’t come up with the chart. I don’t think I should write to the health department – I may be doing rotations there one day. But, come on!

*OK, correction, it was the “County Board of Commissioners.” I should have expected such nonsense to come from them. They are the same group who won’t allow home baked snacks at school events, but will allow pizza and soda.

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “How much peanut butter?

  1. Etta Candy

    you shuold write back to them making fun of the note, they will probably get a kick out of it. better yet, send a one-slice sandwich with half a cup of peanut butter to school with your kid, with a note saying you are complying with the decree. do they specify how much water they may use so they don’t choke?

    or maybe take a picture of the sandwich and send that in.

  2. Reminds me of the time when I talked to a former physician about being vegetarian, and him reminding me to eat enough iron, and I said…um, I get enough iron. I eat lots of leafy greens. He said, “There’s no iron in that stuff.” and I replied with, “Well, what do you suggest I eat then?” His response was red meat or liver.

    Last I checked, there are fifteen times more iron in a serving of spinach than in a serving of beef. And this came from my (once again, former) physician!

    The world knows nothing about true nutrition. Methinks perhaps it stems from some sort of sexual dairy fetish? Or possibly an aversion and/or fear of slightly-charred fruitcakes (as far as the home baked stuff goes).

  3. Sophiesworld

    I read this aloud to my SO and all we could do was crack up. I liked reading the decree in various snooty, official voices! I think I have to second Etta’s idea to take a picture of said lunch and send it to them.

  4. You have GOT to be kidding me. They tell you that you have to give him peanut butter? So, other options?

  5. Oh, the peanut butter category actually had a few options. 2 oz meat, 2 oz cheese, 1 egg or 1/2 cup of peanut butter. Only that category and the fruit and veggie one had any choices. But 1/2 a cup? On one piece of bread? I make peanut butter sandwiches all the time and I don’t use anywhere near that much even on two pieces, and I am a peanut butter fan.

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